Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
...so i touched it.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
