what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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