mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
