Buhtt sex?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
