You smell like a Billy Joel song
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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