somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I forget how to act sober
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
