Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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