...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
