the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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