been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
We left an ass print on the piano.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
