I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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