And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize