Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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