what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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