he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
