I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize