doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
worst night to have a conscience
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
