i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
