I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
