Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
