If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
