he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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