So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
