he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
