Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
