i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
vagina is talking i cant
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
