yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
