My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Randomize
