when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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