i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
