there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
