I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
