he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
