Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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