let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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