The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
