Reggie can tackle my bush.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
