Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
