so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Someone came in the potted fern
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize