Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
