worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
he told me I talked like a deaf person
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
All I want is dick and wine.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
