Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
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