love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
