All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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