I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
