I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
