I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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