just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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