Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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