it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
