is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Randomize