Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
